October 12, 2013

500 Burpees for Time....Why not?

Todays WOD

500 Burpees for time
Time - 55:36

So why would I do 500 Burpees for time you ask? Because it's there and I can. I've never tried to do something like this before and one of my friends suggested that we try it. One thing led to another and the next thing you know, I'm meeting my friends with yoga mat in tow ready to do a sh*t ton of Burpees. To tell the truth, this WOD gave me a "fear boner". I was a little freaked out about it so I went to bed around 8:30 last night just so I could guarantee enough rest to get thru it. I went in with a plan of doing short sets of 10 with some breaks here and there. Here is basically how it went down in my head:

1-50: It's a little chilly out here but I feel good. I'm also glad I brought the yoga mat  and wore the knee socks cause this track would destroy my knees. I also feel a little tight from the chest to bar pull ups two days ago and my legs need to loosen up from yesterdays box jumps. I really don't think 500 is going to be a big deal. 

51-100: I'm officially warm. How is it possible it took me 9 Minutes to get to 100? I can usually do 150 in about ten minutes. I blame Marty. I'm keeping his pace and he's moving slower than old people f*cking. I think I just heard him say 125. That can't be possible....

101-150: Ok. The jacket's coming off and I'm sweating like a whore on nickel night. I really need to make better wardrobe choices. Also this pen I'm using to mark my rounds must be broken because it says I'm at 150 but it feels like 1500. I'll have to yell at Laura and Matt for loaning me a faulty pen. Is 150 half of 500? My mind is getting cloudy...

151-200: My shoes are coming off. They keep catching on the yoga mat. I'm not sure if these knee socks look better or worse without shoes. Also I'm not even halfway yet. I think Marty just said 300 that lying SOB...

201-250: Sweet 8lb 6oz baby Jesus I am finally halfway. I am collecting a nice pool of sweat on this yoga mat that I am pretty sure I will drown in if this goes much longer. I also wish I had brought a pillow because I am having a hard time getting off the ground each time. I should have asked if "Burpee naps" were allowed prior to starting...

251-300: Finally at 300 and I feel great and by great I mean I feel like I've been kicked in the nuts. I obviously am an idiot for attempting this. I think I just saw my Grandfather, Jimi Hendrix, and an Eskimo materialize on the track. This can't be good....

301-350: My Burpees have never looked great but I'm pretty sure at this point I look an epileptic seal humping a yoga mat. I think I see that Eskimo from earlier coming over to club me. I really need a tan...

351-400: Holy crap I only have 100 to go. My hands and knees are starting to look like I was named "Ms. Congeniality" at the federal prison. Come to think of it, all this work is starting to make my ass feel like it as well. At this point prison would feel like a vacation...

401-450: Marty and Matt both just called time. I instantly hate them both and plan their demise...

451-500: Gotta keep moving. At this point my Burpees are shakier than Michael J. Fox's new sitcom. Almost there...... 5-4-3-2-1 Time!

You can add "500 Burpees" to the list of things I will never do again right behind "Marriage". That sucked big time. I'm sure several (or both) of you read this particular post and asked yourself "Why does he keep punishing his body with these ridiculous workouts". The answer is simple. I like to look good naked. There is your visual for the weekend....

You. Are Welcome.



3 comments:

  1. Traditional running shoes, with lots of cushion and support, SUCK for crossfit. at bing

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree. I wear either Nike Metcon1’s or Inov8’s when I am doing a CF WOD that involves lifting.

      Delete
  2. A crossfit training center!I was exactly searching for this.But I need shoes for crossfit first.How can I join your center?

    ReplyDelete